Creating Art

People may forget what you said or did, but they will never forget the way you make them feel.

Maya Angelou

If you want your children to improve, allow them to overhear you say nice things about others.

Haim Ginott

In their innocence, very young children know themselves to be light and love. If we will allow them, they can teach us to see ourselves the same way 

Bias is bad,
you’re making people sad!
We need to fight,
cause we have the right.
Bias is bad, don’t you see?
We deserve to be free
Let’s shine like the stars we are,
everyone knows we’re not that far.
Us stars’ will never drop,
but the bias has to stop!!!

By Rosebud Karolanie,
Angel Masangane

"We Don't Say Those Words in Class!"

As soon as I read the instructions for this assignment, I immediately thought of an occasion where my son made a comment that embarrassed me in the grocery store.  We were checking out and I was casually chatting with the clerk.  My son said “mommy is that a man”?    I tried to ignore it, but he only got louder so I had to answer.  I said “no of course not”.  He then asked “why does she sound like a man”?  I replied by telling him that everyone is different, and then I tried to make light of his comments by joking with the clerk.  Luckily she did not take it too seriously, or at least it didn’t appear that way.  But, there were other customers around and I felt put on the spot because of my son’s questions.  When we left the store I told my son that we must try not to embarrass people or say things that might hurt their feelings.

I think that my joking of the situation could have possibly influenced my son in the wrong way.  I don’t want him to think that we should laugh at those with differences.  I also don’t want him to think that we can’t speak of others differences.  The message that I was attempting to send is that we must speak and address these things in an appropriate way that is not hurtful.

An Anti-Bias educator may address such an issue by providing examples that a child can understand that involves feelings and differences; including ways of how to address their curiosities.  Perhaps an educator would explain an alternative way of asking questions while respecting others.

Gender, Gender Identity, and Sexual Orientation

Any related situations, thoughts, concerns, questions, and/or areas of discomfort you would like to share related to children, gender, and sexual orientation

Having my own 4 yr old son I have especially noticed the gender differences in children's toys, movies, and other games and activities.  These differences begin at birth with color specifications of gender.  My son is now at the age where he has begun to recognize social acceptances of gender roles.  For example, there was a commerical on television which advertised talking stuffed animals.  The commercial highlighted the product by using many shades of pink and purple, and most of the participants were young girls.  There was a short glimpse of a boy playing with one of the animals.  My son looked at me and said "That's not for me because I'm a boy, and he shouldn't play with it either".  I don't buy toys for my child that are associated with female gender, but at the same time he has never asked for that either.  In this occasion I responded to my son, "That looks like it is for all kids, boys and girls".   Thinking back I could have expanded on this by asking why he felt this toy is only for girls.  Asking the question would have opened opportunity for discussion about gender identity.

How you would respond to a parent/family member who informed you they did not want anyone who is perceived (or self-reported) homosexual or transgender to be caring for, educating, and/or interacting with their child?

In my profession as a counselor I had an experience where a parent threatened to end services if I ever discussed or encouraged homosexuality with their child (20yrs old).  This happened on the first day of introduction.  I handled it by informing that parent what is discussed will be left to the client will not be shared because it is not required by law once a child turns 13, unless the safety of the child an or others may be compromised.  Working with children in an early childhood program, my response would be much different to feelings of homosexuality.  I would attempt to find out what their fears are and convince them that any views of sexuality of heterosexuality would not be forced upon their child or any children in the program.  I would discuss the importance of creating a nurturing partnership between the facility and all families, and that sexuality beliefs do not play a significant role in children's development. I have not had class room experience or dealt with this issue directly involving families; but I believe that professionals must do their best to compromise and understand the wishes of the family even if they do not agree.  In some cases this just may not be completely possible and the program may not be a good fit for the child.

Reflecting on Communication in the Early Childhood Field

This course has been tremendously enlightening in gaining understanding in methods and perceptions of communicating, as well as collaborative strategies in setting andreaching goals.  I would like to thank each of my colleagues that I have had the pleasure to correspond with during these past 8 weeks and through out this Master's program.  I am looking forward to the next transition and wish everyone much luck and success in the future. 

Adjourning

I have only experienced difficulty adjourning from a group which I was involved on one occasion.  Growing up and through undergrad I played sports year round.  The main sport that I excelled in was fast pitch softball.  Adjourning from my team at the end of each season was a bit tough.  When I was younger, the emotions related to adjourning were not as intense as when I grew older.  This is likely because when I played sports at a young age I had other sports to look forward to, and often I had the same teammates from one sport to the next. 

At an older age playing in college, the last game of my senior year was challenging.  This is because I was aware of the end of my athletic journey as well as the camaraderie that I had formed with my teammates over the previous four years of my experience.  Each season our team set out to accomplish the same goals, to win our division and our conference.  We all had sight of this goal and learned to work together in attempt to achieve it.  Along the way there was much adversity to overcome such as injuries, competition within the team, or individual conflicts amongst teammates, but we depended on each other for success.  So ultimately if we wanted to achieve our goals we had to work out our struggles to the best of our ability.  

Despite the internal challenges that my teammates and I faced, it was difficult to let go of the relationships that I had built as well as the feeling of belonging that I had with particular group of people.  We all shared the same passion for this particular sport and worked equally as hard to reach a desired outcome.  I do believe high performance groups in this sense are not easy to walk away from.

What I did appreciate about the adjournment period was the acknowledgement of each participant of the team at the end of their senior year.  This along with the memorabilia left us with something to hold on to from the group and share with others. 

It is important to have closure to finalize an experience, including in this master’s program.  I believe that we have come to know each other through discussion and blog pots and hopefully can attend the graduation ceremony together at the end of the program.

Communication Conflicts

Currently I am not experiencing any conflicts within my work place but can remember alt least one occasion when I have. There was a particular intern, who is no longer at the agency, who I struggled with when it came to communicating. This intern was designated a small caseload of clients, however I was the assigned clinician. I found that the intern would not communicate pertinent information involving the case. At first I thought that somehow she did not understand what information should be communicated or perhaps she was not used to working as a team. I discussed with her why we work as a team within the agency and how we must communicate with each other regarding the clients we serve. Following this conversation, there was a major incident where particular protocol was to be followed. However, once again she withheld information that needed to be made aware within our team. Since she was an intern, it was not as difficult to solve this challenge. She was given less responsibility and eventually the internship ended.

One communication conflict strategy that I learned is to share knowledge of education so that people can meet needs and expectations. I could have put more effort in to teaching this intern about the importance of communication and collaboration when working with others who also serve as supports for the clients. As well, I could have done more by helping her understand what types of information needs to be shared and documented accordingly.

Another strategy that I could have used is creating a more balanced atmosphere which would lead to open communication on an equal level. As an intern she may have felt less power in the situation and perhaps unsure of how to communicate within that role.

I believe that these strategies from the 3 R's could be applied to this conflict. Learning about conflict resolution in communication has helped me understand mistakes I have made in the past that led to negative outcomes. I will apply the skills I have learned in the future in attempt to avoid conflicts in communication.

communication similarities and differences

I was surprised at listening styles profile score, according to my co-worker. When I took the test my score for my self was in group 1. Meaning that I am empathetic and concerned with the emotions of others. My husband also scored me in the same group. My co worker however, Scored me in group 2. Meaning that I am “business-like” and my efficiency may intimidate more sensitive listeners. Thinking about this, I suppose that when I am at work I present and communicate differently with my coworkers than with friends or family. I also communicate and present differently with my clients. It is almost as if I categorize my relationships and how I interact within those relationships. I have always been self aware of this but perhaps not to the extent that I needed to be. I would have expect my coworker to also see me as an empathetic listener.

This week I discovered that my past experiences greatly influence the way in which I communicate. I believe these influences have to do with mindlessness and reactions to schemas that I have formed from past interactions.

I also discovered that I subconsciously use self monitoring when interacting with others. I find myself reading cues and knowing how to present myself in situations according to the environment.

I believe that both of these qualities balance my interaction and communication with others. I feel that having a balance of past interaction and present relativity will be helpful when working with children and families.