As soon as I read the instructions for this assignment, I immediately thought of an occasion where my son made a comment that embarrassed me in the grocery store. We were checking out and I was casually chatting with the clerk. My son said “mommy is that a man”? I tried to ignore it, but he only got louder so I had to answer. I said “no of course not”. He then asked “why does she sound like a man”? I replied by telling him that everyone is different, and then I tried to make light of his comments by joking with the clerk. Luckily she did not take it too seriously, or at least it didn’t appear that way. But, there were other customers around and I felt put on the spot because of my son’s questions. When we left the store I told my son that we must try not to embarrass people or say things that might hurt their feelings.
I think that my joking of the situation could have possibly influenced my son in the wrong way. I don’t want him to think that we should laugh at those with differences. I also don’t want him to think that we can’t speak of others differences. The message that I was attempting to send is that we must speak and address these things in an appropriate way that is not hurtful.
An Anti-Bias educator may address such an issue by providing examples that a child can understand that involves feelings and differences; including ways of how to address their curiosities. Perhaps an educator would explain an alternative way of asking questions while respecting others.
Leon'e,
ReplyDeleteWow, it seems we had similar situations involving gender differences. Although the situation was awkward, we both wanted to get the children out of the store as fast as we could without feeling more embrarassed. I am just glad my niece understood it was not nice to speak loudly when we see someone different without hurting their feelings.
Leon'e
ReplyDeleteIt is amazing that how children, speak their minds. They are curious, want to know everything and so they question any where and every where. Sometimes I wonder whether we as adults takeaway their curiosity by trying to teach them about being polite, kind, and considerable of others feelings.
Hi Leon'e. Children are so innocent, aren't they? They just don't realize how their innocence can sometimes be hurful. It's such a hard ballace because we do not want to squash their curiousity or lead them to believe that such diverisity is a 'taboo' topic, but we never know how other's will react and we also do not want to allow them to be disrespectful of others.
ReplyDeleteLeon'e,
ReplyDeleteIn this situation, your son was only revealing the power of his observation and his curiosity and his effort to make sense of the world. Until he is able to understand differences in others this will continue not only among your children but other children as well. Taking the right step to discuss differences and similarities among others will help build healthy and respectful attitudes towards others.
Children can definitely catch us off guard and embarrass us when least expected. This course has given us an opportunity to think about ways to answer questions of curiosity and explain difference to young children in an anti-bias way.
ReplyDeleteI believe that teaching them at this age about differences and being appropriate in public is how a responsible parent shows that they care. I often see adults that do the same thing and they lack tact and politness; I can only imagine this is a cause from their up bringing. I have also had a similar situation even when I was a child but at least you were able to have the discussion with him instead of ignoring him and making him feel ashamed.
ReplyDelete