communication similarities and differences

I was surprised at listening styles profile score, according to my co-worker. When I took the test my score for my self was in group 1. Meaning that I am empathetic and concerned with the emotions of others. My husband also scored me in the same group. My co worker however, Scored me in group 2. Meaning that I am “business-like” and my efficiency may intimidate more sensitive listeners. Thinking about this, I suppose that when I am at work I present and communicate differently with my coworkers than with friends or family. I also communicate and present differently with my clients. It is almost as if I categorize my relationships and how I interact within those relationships. I have always been self aware of this but perhaps not to the extent that I needed to be. I would have expect my coworker to also see me as an empathetic listener.

This week I discovered that my past experiences greatly influence the way in which I communicate. I believe these influences have to do with mindlessness and reactions to schemas that I have formed from past interactions.

I also discovered that I subconsciously use self monitoring when interacting with others. I find myself reading cues and knowing how to present myself in situations according to the environment.

I believe that both of these qualities balance my interaction and communication with others. I feel that having a balance of past interaction and present relativity will be helpful when working with children and families.

Cultural Diversity and Communication

Communication is the process of which individuals use symbols, signs, and behaviors to exchange information (O'Hair & Weimann, 2009). We use communication to begin, maintain, and end relationships. The interactive relationships that I have developed in my life consist of family, friends, and colleagues. Each of these relationships are important but different in how I use communication exchanges. Naturally my family and most of my friends share similarities of cultural aspects, i.e. race, religion, marital status, and interest, and lifestyle. In my work place I interact with a much more culturally diverse group, and I must be mindful of this factor which influences communication. One such factor is the diversity amongst my self, clients, and other employees. Diversity can create potential misunderstandings or conflict stemming from the way we each individually make sense out of the world (Beebe, Beebe, & Redmond, 2011). I believe that I do find my self communicating differently in the work environment because of the variations in age, gender, sexual orientation , ethnicity, and intellectual ability. This is partly because I have learned to adapt to others and the environment according to the context of the relationship. For example when speaking with my clients who are developmentally disabled, I make sure I use appropriate language that meets their level of comprehension. At times I may also rely on pictures when communicating with an individual who is non verbal. Another example of adaptive communication in the work place is the way I communicate with other colleagues. I have closer relationships with some of my colleagues opposed to others. I find that when communicating with those I am closer to, I may share my personal opinion of topic that is non therapeutic and based on my background and upbringing. However, when communicating with a colleague who I do not have a close personal relationship with I generally give input based on therapeutic practices and what is generally acceptable to say in the situation. I believe this is because there are different levels of comfort.  Those I am closer to, I automatically know that they understand and accept me so I am comfortable displaying my self. Those I am not close to, I do not want to judge me out side of my professional abilities.

 

O’Hair, D. & Wiemann, M. (2009). Real communication: An introduction. New York: Bedford/St. Martin’s.

Beebe, S. A., Beebe, S. J., & Redmond, M. V. (2011). Interpersonal communication: Relating to others (6th ed.). Boston, MA: Allyn & Bacon. Chapter 4, "Interpersonal Communication and Diversity: Adapting to Others" (pp. 85–114)Copyright 2011 by Allyn & Bacon, Inc. Reprinted by permission of Allyn & Bacon, Inc., via the Copyright Clearance Center.

communication

The office:

This is a show that I have only seen previews for and not sure what plot it is actually based on. 

No audio:

In the episode there is a man who seems to be the leader and perhaps the boss.  Another man who is overweight seems to be portrayed as lazy because of his size and lack of attention in the meeting.   The “boss” who is leading the meeting uses cues such as nonverbal gestures i.e. pointing, and large hand movements.  He appears to demand control and dislike challenges. 

(This is an advertising company.  The meeting is about directions to the office garden party.  The boss is instructing his employees on eating and proper etiquette for the party.  Even though the overweight man is does not appear to be paying attention, he asked a question that pertains to the party. )

No audio:

In the lunch room there are two ladies.  One is pregnant.  They are having a conversation.  One of them looks surprised as if she is discovering new information.  I would assume from this scene that the ladies are gossiping about someone in the office.

(Both of the ladies are pregnant and discussing pregnancy topics.  One of them becomes surprised when the other reveals the name of the baby which turns out to be the same for both.)

No audio:

There is a party held outside of work.  The office workers attend the party with spouses.  They appear to be making attempts to impress someone who may be a large business investor or maybe the person who the party is in honor of.  The boss of the office is very disappointed in what transpired at the party, though several comedic unprofessional events. 

(They party is in attempt to impress the CEO and ultimately the boss’s parents. The boss’s official title is regional manager and he is seeking the same acceptance as his brother receives from their parents.  The man whom he seems to be seeking the most attention from is his dad.  Without Audio I thought the man was his Boss.)   

No audio:

Also there seems to be a competitive nature between the women in the earlier scene in the lunch room.  I would assume they are competing for credit.  Following this others in the room begin competing for attention while making speeches.  The tone of the room appears that the behavior has become embarrassing; however, everyone begins to join in and smile.  This indicates that they are enjoying the moments.   

(The ladies continue to compete over the name of their child.  The CEO gives a speech that discredits the boss and himself and uplifts the employees followed by the dad’s duet with the son.  This allows the son to feel the acceptance he’s been looking for until the other brother joins their dad in song.  The facial expression of the boss (son) is disappointed and he runs off.  Without audio I assumed he was upset about the antics of the employees at the office while everyone els appeared happy.)

It was very different watching with audio.  I was able to put together the verbal and nonverbal cues to understand the interactions with the characters.  Without audio I had to use assumptions based on non verbal cues only which made my assumptions only partly accurate.  I believe that I would have been more accurate in my assumptions if this were a show that I had known well.  This is because I would know who the characters are and their personalities.   Although, I do not believe that I could be completely accurate without the verbal cues and context of communication.

competent communication

The person I feel who demonstrates effective communication is a psychiatrist that I have known for 6 years.  We work together in a community mental health program.   The reason I believe this Dr. displays excellent communication is because she thoroughly explains herself when discussing symptoms or behaviors related to mental health.   She also thoroughly explains medications used for treating those mental health symptoms.  Though discussion, the Dr. has shared with me her desire to teach others information and that her primary goal is to help people in any way she can.  Not only does she share information but she is open to others opinions and supports a team approach to treatment.   There are other Dr.’s in the program I work for, who I feel carry a certain ideal of supremacy, arrogance, and entitlement.   I find her to be the exact opposite and in fact she is very flexible and open minded.  O’Hair and Wiemann (2009) declare, communication is appropriate when it meets the expectations of the communication partner.   It is evident that the Dr. meets the needs of those she is communicating with.    I feel that the Dr.’s approach to communication would also be useful in the early childhood field.   Educators need to be open and flexible especially when communicating and collaborating with diverse families.  It is also important to show respect to colleagues and accepting of their opinions as well.

 O’Hair, D., & Wiemann, M. (2009). Real communication: An introduction. New York: Bedford/St. Martin’s.

Professional Hopes and Goals

My hope for all children is to have access to early education programs regardless of their economic circumstance or cultural background.  I would like to see our state and federal programs take more initiative in implementing quality programs and ensuring equal opportunity to those of diverse backgrounds.  Our children are worth the investment. 

From this course I have learned that each child despite their back ground is subject to acts of discrimination and marginalization.  As educators we need to understand the effects that biases and prejudices have on children in order to prevent and combat the occurrence.  Providing examples of prejudice and discrimination of my own experiences throughout this course has resurfaced many childhood memories and feelings.  My goal is to help children who have or are experiencing these acts overcome their challenges.  Also teaching children in early childhood about diversity will help eliminate these hurtful behaviors.

Thank You to each of my colleagues for encouraging me in this course and for being nonjudgmental about the personal information that I shared of myself.  I have greatly enjoyed the lessons learned and look forward to the next course.  

Welcoming Families From Around the World

The country I chose for this blog assignment is Greece.  This is a country that I am not familiar with, but in the past there was client enrolled in my counseling program whose parents are from Greece.  So I felt this county would be appropriate for this assignment.

1.     I would find an interpreter if needed to communicate

2.     Since individuals from Greece are passionate about their background, culture, and ancestry I would begin by educating myself on the traditions customs of Greece such as the festivals, holidays and foods that have long been a part of the country.

3.     I believe it would be especially important to learn about the countries religious traditions.  For example, the Orthodox Church is very present in education and children have obligations to religious courses and pray all together every morning before starting the classes in private or public schools.  Also is may be useful to learn of Greek the superstitions of religious nature.

4.     It would also be important to learn about Greek communication and family relationships.

5.     Finally I believe it is important to communicate with the family themselves.  Getting to know the individual family unit and build a relationship while understanding their expectations of the program.

I believe that this preparation will help the family feel welcomed and accepted in a new environment.  Also I believe that this will help form a partnership with the family to provide the best care for the child.

The Personal Side of Bias, Prejudice, and Oppression

My sister is a single mom with a son who is 4yrs old.  My nephew was born with some GI complications.  He spent his first month in a hospital in California.  My mom and I were in Washington, where we still live.  My sister was working in California and attempting to relocate closer to family.  During her transition my husband and I helped her out by taking over care for her son and overseeing his medical treatment.  I was also 8 months pregnant.  While in my care my nephew became sick again and spent another month 1/2 in the hospital. The social worker at the hospital had set up community resources upon discharge to help me support my nephew at home since he needed ongoing care.  Since I was responsible for his care, his medical assistance and other supports were in my name.  One requirement was that my nephew drinks a special formula that helps babies gain weight.  Since it is for babies with nutritional challenges the formula is very very expensive.  More than twice the cost of regular Enfamil.  I was referred to WIC to cover the cost.  My mom drove me to my first appointment at the WIC office.  When we met with the counselor who completed the intake she made a comment that really disturbed me.  She stated “When you come in to the office we expect respect and patience.  If you come in like where’s my checks, I want my checks now, then we are not going to help you.”  As she said this she was rolling her neck as if imitating someone with a negative attitude.  It caught me off guard at first.  I asked her, "why would you think I would be disrespectful?”  She replied, “we get that a lot in here so I just want to let you know our rules.”  I then told her, “I know how to conduct myself in a professional manner.  I am educated with a college degree, and work in the social service field just as you.  I would never come in to an office yelling or demanding anything from anyone.” 

I’m unsure of the exact reason she made those statements.  Maybe because she thought I was poor; which would mean she has a bias against those of less fortune.  Or because I am a black woman; which would mean she has a bias against black women.  Or perhaps for both reasons.  I personally believe that since I had state medical insurance in my name she categorized me for that reason without knowing anything more about me. But whatever the reason, I was very unhappy when I left the office.  I felt that she made an assumption about my character based on appearance and the fact that I needed WIC to help with the cost of formula for my nephew.  She assumed I was poor, uneducated, unprofessional, and disrespectful.   In that moment I felt judged for needing assistance.  Because she was in an authoritative position it felt as if she looked down upon me.  Had she known anything about my personal life she likely would not have made those statements.  My mom and I discussed this on the way home which helped me get over that experience.  I did see the woman on other occasions when I went in to the WIC office but did not have any more interaction with her.   

I was glad that I spoke up in that situation because I think she needed to know that she should never make assumptions such as that about people.  Hopefully this changed her approach to others who are provided assistance in the program.  She should interact with people on an individual basis without carrying prior experiences in to new introductions.